Saying goodbye

11 Jul

It is by far the hardest part of owning a pet.

You may not even want to think about it but this blog will be here for you if and when you need it or for when you feel strong enough to read it.

We would all prefer that when that time comes our pet would simply drift off and pass away in their sleep but this rarely happens.

Sometimes we are faced with having to make the difficult decision to put them to sleep as it is the only way we can ease their pain and suffering

It can be the single last act of kindness you can do for your pet. It is selfless and brave to let them go peacefully and with dignity.

I want to talk you through the process of what happens before, during and after. I will give you some tips that can help make it as smooth and stress free as possible and also give you some ideas of what options you have afterwards.

It can be so hard to know when it’s ‘the right time’ I’d say only you know as you know your pet the most. However veterinary staff can offer support and guidance. They will examine your pet and chat about your pets quality of life with you.

Some things to consider when thinking about your pets qualify of life:

Are they in pain? Are the trembly and weak. Can they get out of bed and are happy pottering around going on walks?

Has their pain relief stopped working as well, are they disengaged, hiding away?

Have they shortness of breath, struggle to get up, have they gone off their food?

How is their toileting? are they going wherever they are lay or having accidents in the house

Has their behaviour changed? Do they seem confused, no longer greet you at the door, are they pacing and panting.

How long as your pet been like this?

How are you coping are you able to meet their needs are you feeling overwhelmed with it all?

If your vet is concerned about your pets welfare they may recommend euthanasia there and then but ultimately you have the final say.

You would be able to spend sometime with your pet and decide if you agree.

If your pet is still coping and your vet isn’t as concerned about their welfare but perhaps knows you are considering putting your pet to sleep then they can give you more time to spend with them at home and leave it for you to book the appointment when that time comes.

Leaflets and handouts can be given so you can explore options on crematoriums and grief support.

What happens at the appointment

Your vet will discuss any concerns you may have and talk you through the process. You will be asked to read and sign a consent form which legally gives us permission to euthanise your pet.

If your pet is anxious or stressed then sometimes we give them a light sedation to make the experience more calm.

Sometimes it’s necessary to take your pet away whilst an intravenous catheter is placed in their leg, a small area will be clipped, cleaned and catheter placed.

Catheters can be placed in back legs too so don’t be alarmed you notice this.

Always make sure your vet places a intravenous catheter, some vets go off the needle but if the vein blows, collapses then the injection will go under the skin and will sting then they would need to try to find the vein again. It is much more controlled if you have a catheter in place and secured with tape.

Placing the intravenous catheter feels like a small scratch. That is the only painful part for the pet.

The lethal injection is administered through the catheter and into the vein.

It is an overdose of a anaesthetic and it takes seconds to take affect and your pet drifts off to sleep.

Some things to note, the body fully relaxes so they may empty their bladder, they don’t close their eyes and I feel I need to warn you when all of the muscles relax the diaphragm which is the muscle separating your chest and tummy when it relaxes it can look like your pet is moving their chest and even gasping and it can happen a few times. Please note this is not them breathing or gasping it’s the muscles relaxing and your pet has already passed so are not aware of it.

Your vet will check your pets heart to make sure he/she has gone.

Should I stay or should I go?

Some people have strong opinions on this but I feel you should do whatever you feel best and most comfortable. If you feel you can’t be with them then some people ask relatives to stay with their pet or veterinary staff. Veterinary staff will cuddle your pet and talk to them and treat them with dignity throughout the whole process.

I know it’s extremely upsetting for you but please try to remain calm for your pet so that aren’t worried.

Sometimes, people like to bring their other pets to a euthanasia appointment so that they can see their animal companion at the end. Some may feel this gives a sense of closure or prevents their other pets from worrying about what happened to their friend. It can be hard to know what an animal may be going through and to what extent they understand, but many owners feel their pets might benefit from this experience.

If you wish to show another pet the body after they have passed away, it’s usually best for someone to stay outside the room with your other pet(s) for the procedure and then bring them in afterwards.

What happens to my pet’s body afterwards?

Let your vet know if you want to take your pet’s collar, harness or carry box home with you, or if you’d prefer to leave it. If it’s something you would like, you can also ask for a keepsake such as a clipping of fur to take home with you and we offer paw prints too.

Once you’ve said your goodbyes, your pet’s body will be treated with respect.

There are several options for what can happen afterwards and there is no right answer – it’s a very personal decision. It’s most common to choose cremation arranged by the vet but this is by no means the only option.

Communal cremation. Your pet will be cremated alongside other loved pets and their ashes will then be buried or scattered by the crematorium. With this type of cremation, it’s not possible for their ashes to be returned to you.

Individual cremation. If it’s important for you to have your pet’s ashes returned, the vet can arrange an individual cremation. Often, you can choose the type of casket you would like and an engraving if you wish. Your pet’s ashes may be delivered to the practice and they will let you know when they are ready to be collected. Some pet crematoriums will arrange to deliver your pet’s ashes directly to your home.
Private cremation. You may prefer to get your pet cremated somewhere of your own choosing rather than at the crematorium the practice usually uses. You might prefer this if you want to be present at your pet’s cremation. If you wish, the vet can keep your pet’s body safe for you in the meantime – in this case remember to give your chosen pet crematorium company your vet’s contact details to arrange things.
Home burial. If you wish, you usually can take your pet’s body home with you. In a few circumstances – for example, if your pet has recently had chemotherapy, or was suffering from a contagious disease – then this isn’t possible. We would recommend digging a deep grave (at least 4ft or 1m) to avoid your pet’s remains being disturbed by other animals.

Pet keepsake ideas and activities to do as a family

If your pet came to your home from a rescue, you may choose to donate to a charity or pet rescue, in your pet’s name.
Planting a tree, memorial rose or flowers to brighten up your garden in your pet’s memory.
Create a lasting memorial such as a digital or print scrapbook, with written messages, photographs and drawings.
Choose a stone plaque or memorial headstone to create an outdoor memorial.
Ask for an ink or clay paw print to be taken of your pet.
Incorporate a token amount of your pet’s ashes in memorial jewellery.

Local Pet crematoriums

https://www.thepetcrematoria.co.uk/our-crematoria/the-pet-crematorium-durham/

https://www.scrappyspetcrematorium.co.uk

https://www.seahampetcrematorium.co.uk They also offer a service where a vet can do a home visit, so your pet can be euthanised in the comfort of their home.

https://www.cpccares.com/locations/cpc-livingston/ This is based in Scotland and the ashes delivered back to you.

https://www.forgetmenotpetcrem.co.uk A very popular crematorium